


Not All Treasure is Silver and Gold

by Baconoire



Category: League of Legends
Genre: Bacon, Drinking, Everyone Is Gay, F/F, Fluff and Smut, Handcuffs, Strap-Ons
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-09
Updated: 2020-04-09
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:21:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,940
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23552248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Baconoire/pseuds/Baconoire
Summary: After exacting her revenge on Gangplank and his followers, Miss Fortune decides that it’s time for a vacation. Join Sarah and the Crimson Scabbard crew as she sails across the high seas to get it on with the Runeterra’s sexiest ladies.
Relationships: Miss Sarah Fortune/Vi/Caitlyn
Kudos: 13





	Not All Treasure is Silver and Gold

**Author's Note:**

> Big thanks to derplolplayer and Aelinna for helping me make this.

Aboard the brigantine-class ship the Syren, the deck is a bustling hive of activity as the Crimson Scabbard crew rushes around carrying supplies to and from the dock below. Remaining still amidst this chaos are two individuals engaged in conversation. One is a Marai, a type of vastayan resembling a mermaid, gently floating on a small tide of water. The other is a buxom redhead fiddling around with a belt to keep one of her baggy shirt sleeves strapped to her arm.

Nami fidgets around with a lavish captain’s coat folded in her arms. “You’re sure you want to go in alone?” 

Finished donning her relatively pedestrian garb, Sarah faces her. “Yeah. It’s better if I do this deal solo. Plus, we don’t want to attract any unwanted attention here in Piltover, especially from the Wardens. With all the commotion I’ve heard happening in Zaun, it’d be better if you and the rest of the crew stay close to the dock and protect the ship.” 

“That’s what I’m worried about. What will happen if you... _when_ you get into some trouble?”

Twirling her oversized pistols around her index fingers and holstering them in an exaggerated flourish, the redhead ends her short performance with an all too cocky kiss in the air and wink. “There’s not a thing alive that can resist my _guns_. Besides, this shouldn't take me past the evening. You can last that long without me, right?”

For a moment, the Marai’s orange eyes widen to the size of grapefruits. Yellow cheeks flushing, she looks down. “If you're absolutely sure…” Nami shifts around, struggling to meet her captain’s gaze.

Using a finger to raise the flustered woman’s head up, Sarah looks at her, this time with an uncharacteristically straight face. “Nothing will happen to me. I promise.” 

Confidence returning, Nami smiles as her friend walks down the ramp of the Syren. “Good luck out there!”

Without looking back, Sarah takes off her signature tricorn hat and lifts it high as she struts across the dock towards the massive marble entrance leading into the City of Progress. The Marai stares after her, attention focused on the captain’s broad hips, swaying alluringly with each step as if to emphasize their departure.

  
  


* * *

  
  


“Have you heard the news lately?! Gangplank is dead. You know who killed that bastard? That’s right. Me.” Sarah crosses her arms in frustration.

“The demise of The Saltwater Scourge by your hands is what allowed you to gain an audience with Clan Medarda in the first place. Besides that, it is of no consequence to the business at hand. I will admit however, his disappearance will help immensely for opening up the trade routes of Piltover. On behalf of Clan Medarda, I thank you.”

Walking down a cobblestone pathway in a small residential park, Sarah and a sharply dressed businessman continue their conversation. A few children run about playing with circular disks emitting a rainbow of lights, heedless of the underworld dealing occurring before them. The sky is a bright red as the sunset casts elaborate shadows on the streets below. Geometric silhouettes of all forms serve to outline the intricate structures of Piltover’s affluence.

“Alright, listen. If you don’t think the generous sum of gold I’m offering is worth a few of your hextech gizmos, the Crimson Scabbard will happily take its business somewhere else. Perhaps the underhive of Zaun would be more willing to do business with us? A little birdy told me that the chem barons are eager to strike up a deal for anyone willing to fund them.” 

After adjusting the golden monocle grafted to his temple, the man places his hands behind his back. “Hmmm… That simply won’t do. With the escalation of violence between our two cities, letting this opportunity slip into their hands could lead to disaster.”

Sarah stops just before the marble archway exit and turns to the man, forcing him to do the same. “How about this Cornelius. I’ll let Medarda think it over for a day. The Syren will be finished being refit and resupplied by tomorrow evening. Same place and time?”

Noticeably frowning, Cornelius rubs his grey beard in thought. Experienced eyes hound the woman’s features closely as if taking them into his calculations. “I shall bring these developments to the house head at once but I make no promises.” 

Blue eyes burning with conviction, Sarah lets the venom of her words spit out. “Just know this, I’ve got big plans for this coming voyage and I fully intend on equipping my crew with the best weapons money can buy. I don’t care if it’s a horde of Winter’s Claw raiders, Noxus’ own Trifarian Legion or even Nagakabouros herself trying to smite us from the twelve seas, I’ll be thrice damned if I don’t give them at least a fighting chance.” Features softening, the redhead sinks back to her cool demeanour. “Remember. It’s your choice who I give my business to. All you’re really doing is choosing whether I take an elevator trip down or not.” 

A bead of sweat runs down the man’s brow, betraying his usually calm authority. Placing an arm across his stomach, Cornelius takes a deep bow. “Your _passion_ is noted. I’ll find you tomorrow at the docks with our answer. Have a good day Miss Fortune.”

“You too.” Removing her hat, Sarah imitates the gesture and the two part ways at the exit.

  
  


* * *

  
  


_I fucking hate dealing with stuck up, hoity-toity types. I need a drink._

I wander through opulent brick streets, searching for the one thing that would settle me down after such an annoying negotiation. A drink. It’s almost night time as I pass probably my dozenth bar, none meeting my rigorous standard. They were all either too gaudy, clean or a horrendous combination of the two. 

From the corner of my vision, I notice immense monuments towering above every street but not a single one catches my eye. Not an impossibly large, ornate statue of some scientist made of gold. Not a brilliantly lit model of celestial bodies powered by hextech floating above the streets. Not a single technological wonder or artistic marvel causes me to falter in my mission. To a normal person, these things would at least elicit some form of gawking at their spectacle. To me, all of them were visual disturbances, mere distractions from the allure of a glass of the good stuff. 

The women roaming the streets were a reflection of Piltover in much the same way I was a reflection of Bilgewater. They were “prim and proper” ladies wearing large frilled dresses which served to over exaggerate their assets in a strange amalgamation of whorish pretentiousness. I preferred to be upfront and practical, exposing what needed to be exposed, whether it was my pair of pistols, Shock and Awe or my pronounced cleavage. My appearance served to either warn or beguile those who saw me. No need to muddle it with useless pageantry.

Instinctively, I ended up being drawn to the lower districts. Not far enough down to smell the chemical-drenched wastes of Zaun, but just low enough to see a few broken windows and street lamps flickering on and off. The clocktower lording over both cities rings that it is ten-o-clock, a bit later than what I had predicted. _Sorry Nami. It’s my first time roaming Piltover’s streets and I’ll be damned if I don’t get a swig straight from the tap._

A glowing neon sign catches my attention. “Delayed Progress” it reads. I could smell a pungent odour wafting through its stained sliding windows causing my nose to crinkle. A man lays sprawled against the side of the building, sleeping or dead, I wasn’t certain. Now THIS was my type of drinking establishment!

Pushing the creaky door frame, the chiming of bell signals my arrival. Inside was exactly what I expected. A combination of people down on their luck and the wealthy looking for a release from the mundane excess of the Piltover’s high class society. Beyond the dilapidated walls and wares, the place had a certain charm to it. All conversations die down as the patrons turn to gawk at me like I was some sort of foreign treasure worth coveting. I make an effort to put an extra spring in my strut but pay no heed to their lustful stares.

_Sorry boys and girls, not what I’m craving for tonight. Not yet at least..._

The bartender raises a brow, eyeing me up and down carefully while shining a mug. Before taking a seat on a particularly nice looking barstool at the counter directly in front of him, I remove my belt and lay my holstered firearms on the oaken surface to quash any notions of hostility. Several deep indents litter the spot I place them on.

Seeing me notice the damage, the middle aged man smirks and puts away his freshly cleaned glass. Leaning forward on the counter, he reveals a brass hand whirring with hextech mechanisms. Not nearly as extravagant as the other augmentations among those in the higher districts but still, definitely not cheap.

“What’ll ya have tonight miss?”

“Give me a tall glass of the best brew Piltover has to offer!”

“Heh. A pint of Amber Sump coming right up!” he sings with a gruff voice.

The scene that plays out before me is a thing of beauty. With mechanical precision he grabs a tall glass from behind the counter and rinses it out with cold water from the sink. Bringing the container underneath a bronze tap and tipping it at a forty-five degree angle, I bear witness to the most magnificent thing I’ve seen all day. A rich stream of liquid gold flows from the tap and into the mug with a melodious sound much like how an ocean siren calls out to sailors at sea. Tipping the glass upright when it is about halfway full, the bartender ensures a little less than an inch of foam forms on the top. _He knows his stuff._

The light catches the glass at a perfect angle causing it to emit an otherworldly glow around it. Topped with a thin crown of foam, I feel the inside of my mouth moisten with desire. Amber Sump. This pint was easily worth more than all the gaudy statues and machines I’ve seen today put together. Before the bartender places the glass in front of me, the door rings to the sound of a new patron.

“Vi! Right on time!”

I turn to see the scum that dared to interrupt my service. Stomping in authoritatively is an athletic woman with stylized pink hair, one side partially shaved. She wears a short brown leather jacket, along with lightly armoured pants and a shirt that did well to expose the top of her chest. On her forehead she has a pair of gear-shaped goggles, on her face a number piercings and a cocky grin that could nearly rival my own. What really set her apart though were her shapely hips which practically demanded attention as she walked. Coming closer, I only notice she has on a pair of enormous mechanical hands, each almost the size of her torso. Several in the bar cheer while others sink further into their drinks.

_Huh._

An irritated look crosses her face as she takes a seat next to me on my left. She flicks several locks on each side of her gauntlets causing them to disengage. In similar fashion to myself, she takes off her oversized weapons and places them on the counter, only hers causes familiar dents to sink into the wood.

“Gustav! You know me, I’ll be late to almost everything except when it comes to a proper drink!” She gives him a playful wink and a smirk. “The usual please.”

Gustav passes the glass of heavenly nectar, the drink I’ve spent so long to hunt down for in this damned city, to the newcomer. It was like someone ripped my heart right out of my chest and shoved it down my throat for good measure. 

_What. The. FUCK._

Without a second thought, the woman downs the glass in a single gulp. 

Using a wrap covered arm to wipe off the excess foam around her mouth, she lets out a content sigh. “That really hits the spot!” Noticing me glower in the corner of her eye, she rotates her barstool to face me in full. “What’s biting you, Red?”

“That was MY drink.”

Gustav turns back to me, flinching back at my overly aggressive scowl. He immediately gets to preparing another one as I continue glaring venomously at the punk next to me.

“Heh. Well that’s my spot you’re in.” She points at my seat. “Plus, it’s illegal to carry firearms after sunset.”

My jaw instinctively clenches as I raise a brow. “ _Illegal_? What are you? Some kind of cop?”

“Warden,” she corrects, matter of factly.

_Warden? Well shit._

“I’m off work though, so whether I care enough to do anything about it is up to you, _Red_.” She gives me a domineering gaze through unflinching lilac eyes.

A small bead of sweat rolls down Gustav’s temple as he passes me a fresh glass full of Amber Sump. “Apologies for the wait miss. Heroes of the city get special treatment. Consider this one on the house.”

Luckily for the woman, I have more pressing issues. Breaking our staredown, I focus on my drink. 

“Tch. That’s what I thought.” She raises a finger to get the bartender’s attention. “Another one over here Gus.”

My frustration abates as I test the flavour with a small sip. A smooth wheat flavour floods my pallet. The bitterness of the alcohol changes suddenly as an unexpected kick at the end causes me to click my tongue unconsciously. This was heaven. After several more sips I lay my empty glass down on a coaster. I hold my hand up, signalling for another before turning to the woman next to me.

“Hey sweetheart. Do we have a problem here?”

“Not unless you really want one.” Without looking at me, she starts on her second glass.

I scoff, finishing my next glass almost as fast as she had with her first. “Nah. I hate dealing with _pigs_.”

Gulping down her drink, she turns to me, an inferno blazing in her eyes. “You wanna settle this outside? No weapons. I’ll even let you take the first shot.” She taps her chin enticingly in an effort to goad me in. 

I glance at her wrapped forearms. Solid bands of muscle underneath only getting larger around her biceps. Short fingernails curiously enough. With a wry smirk I give my own glare. “I like your fire, but why throw fists when a few drinks will work just as well?”

“Huh. Not a bad idea. Guess those shoulders are supporting more than that giant chest of yours.”

“Yeah? Let’s see if you can drink as much as you talk.”

Rolling his eyes as if he’s seen this exact situation play out many times before, Gustav grabs multiple glasses from behind the counter. “Goddamn it, if this ends up in another bar fight…”

“Don’t worry Gus. If it comes to that, it won’t last long,” Vi reassures.

“Hmph. So, do you have a name sweetheart? Or is _pig_ good enough?”

“Vi, Piltover Enforcer” she growls. “And who do I owe the pleasure?”

“Fortune. Sarah Fortune,” I announce proudly. 

Gustav places a couple of tall ones in front of us and immediately starts preparing another pair. “Alright you two. You’ll be matching each other pint for pint. Make sure the bottom’s clear, Delayed Progress may not be the cleanest pub in Piltover but there’s no shortchanging here.”

We both nod.

He turns to me. “Also, the loser pays for the drinks.”

“Heh. Fine with me. That just means more free drinks!”

“We’ll see for who, Fortune.”

Having finished pouring a second pair and placing them in front of us, Gustav raises his brass hand. “Okay ladies, when I set down the next pair, go.” 

The grips on our glasses tighten as the bartender fills the next batch of drinks simultaneously on separate taps. From the corner of my vision I see Vi raise a middle finger while winking. I respond by pressing a hand against my mouth, spreading both my middle and ring fingers and while thrashing the air between them with my tongue. Flinching back for a moment, she quickly refocuses on her glass, a slight shade of red tinting her cheeks. 

_Cute._

Gustav brings down the third set of drinks on the bar, his prosthetic arm sounding off with a decisive whirr. 

In unison, we start chugging. The first glass goes down without a hitch. So does the second. So does the third. A crowd begins forming at the bar, the customers assembling in a semicircle of raucous cheers. At the fourth, I feel a little tipsy and begin to slow down by the fifth drink. 

Vi snickers obnoxiously, waiting for me to finish my glass. Whether such a hyena sounding noise was her natural laugh or something artificial intended to piss me off, it did its job. Gritting my teeth, I chug it down in time for Gustav to serve the sixth. 

Besides the gurgling in my stomach, this was a dream come true. With the support of the crowd filling me with energy, I quickly down the seventh glass. Wiping off the excess foam around the corners of my mouth, I look to Vi as she struggles to finish hers off. Swallowing her discomfort, she drains the glass to the squealing delight of her fans. 

The eighth (technically tenth) drink of the night is where we both falter. The toned woman beside me nurses the beer pathetically, struggling to put more alcohol in her system. I merely stare into it with tired eyes, mesmerized by the faint reflection of myself in the beautiful Amber Sump. Gustav stops pouring and watches, a layer of exertion covering his forehead and small wisps of smoke coming from his augmented arm.

Time begins to slow as I fight off the urge to collapse. The crowd’s hoots and hollers degenerates into incomprehensible white noise around me. I look at Vi who is now desperately sipping from her glass. Shaking off my fatigue, I breathe heavily and hold my drink firm. Vision clouding, I feel the rush of alcohol scratch down my throat like coarse sand.

Slamming the glass down, I turn again to my fellow competitor who shies away from her half full glass, shaking her head with a queasy burp.

“Damn it…” she utters.

“With a record breaking eight pints! Our winner and new champion! Miss Sarah Fortune!” Gustav announces to a mixture of excited cheers and quiet boos. 

Grabbing Vi’s unfinished drink, I shakily get off my seat and stand triumphantly before the crowd. Downing the glass, I throw the glass over my shoulder and bow. Gustav must have caught it since the shattering of glass didn’t follow. After a few more moments of basking in my glory, I turn back to the still seated Vi. Upper torso leaning forward on the oak counter with her chin resting on her arms she stares ahead glumly.

“You are quite possibly the saddest looking thing with pink hair I have EVER seen!”

Already shining one of the numerous glasses crowding him, Gustav intervenes. “Come on now. You already won.”

I put up my hands in innocence. “Hey, I’m just doing a little teasing! Besides, she’s gotta have thick skin. She’s a cop after all.”

“Yeah, yeah.” He turns to Vi. “Well, time to pay up.”

Retreating her head into the confines of her crossed arms so only her pink hair could be seen. “I don’t have the cash on me Gus,” she admits in a muffled moan.

The bartender groans out. “Goddamn it Vi! Did you destroy another building again?” 

She raises up two fingers.

“Oh geez… No wonder you were so keen on this. Your tab’s already full too…”

“Well, well, well… Looks like it’s your lucky day Viiiii…” I manage to slur out. “I’d be happy to pay off tonight’s drinks if in exchange you and I go somewhere for a little fun.” My hand makes a scissor gesture for emphasis.

Perking her head up with renewed vigour, Vi stares at me with a look of inebriated surprise. “Holy shit Fortune, I’ll take you up on that offer. Thanks! You’ve got more than just a pretty face, you know that?”

“You can bet your fine ass I know that. I’ve also got a… Big chest… Chest of gold? Whatever.” Somehow forgetting the word ‘heart’ I opt to pat my prodigious bust proudly before taking out an engorged pouch of gold from my belt. I absentmindedly toss it to Gustav. “Keep the change.”

Swiping it from midair, he feels the heft and looks inside. With an enormous grin he gives me a thumbs up. “Come back anytime, Miss Fortune.”

“Anytime I’m in this shitty city, count on me to be here, Goose.” I start putting on my belt. “Alright Pinky… Back to your place?”

“Yeah sure. My apartment’s not too fa-” Before Vi can finish her sentence, a nauseating gurgle comes from her throat and she rushes to the bathroom.

“HA! Lightwei-” A similar sound interrupts me and I quickly follow after her.

Before making it to the doors Gustav calls after us, “Keep it clean in there!”

  
  


* * *

  
  


Walking, well, actually more like stumbling down the darkened Piltover streets with our arms over each other’s shoulders, Vi and I laugh merrily as she regales me with stories of her time in the Wardens. 

“And he was like ‘Oh no! Stop hitting me! Ow my face!’” Vi pleads in a hyperbolic voice.

I burst out laughing while wiping a tear from my face. “Oh man, I never knew police brutality could be so funny!”

“Yeah, there are a lot of scummy folks out there that deserve a taste of these fists.” Steam pours out of an exhaust port as she clenches a mechanical fist for emphasis.

“Vi, you’re probably the coolest cop I’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting.”

“Awww thanks. You’re the best… redhead I’ve ever met.”

I think about mentioning the fact that I’m a pirate but decide that it was best not to risk getting on her bad side.

We soon reach the grand entrance of a tall building complex without any interruptions. Passing between gigantic spires of steel etched with embellished gear sigils, we make it to a large glass door. Removing a gauntlet to take out a card from her wallet, she places it under a scanner which slides open the entryway. Inside is something I would never consider a mere ‘apartment’ if it weren’t for the fact that this was Piltover.

Even in my drunken state, I could tell that we were in a fancy hotel. The lobby was squeaky clean with an unholy number of fat leather couches everywhere. I couldn’t avoid seeing at least one snobby piece of art, an elegant picture frame or statuette was always there no matter where I looked. The sheer wealth was suffocating to say the least.

“This doesn’t seem like the kinda place that suits you,” I chide jokingly.

Vi yawns loudly while pressing a button for the elevator. “Wasn’t my choice,” she mumbles.

If that’s all she cared to say about it, I wouldn’t push the matter.

With a happy ding, the doors open and we make our way in. She presses the top most button.

“The penthouse? Are you sure you needed help paying for the bill?”

“Yeah. I kinda levelled two buildings while chasing some goons today. Thankfully no one _innocent_ got hurt but the damages will be deducted from my pay so I’ll be in the red for the next little while.” She shrugs nonchalantly. “Just the price I gotta pay to legally beat the shit out of people.”

“Well, it’s no time to worry about that then. You need to focus on paying me back,” I purr while licking my lips.

Lifting a massive gauntlet which could easily squeeze the life out of me behind my back, Vi pulls me in close. “I’ll give you a night you won’t forget,” she whispers while gazing at me with lilac coloured eyes.

Despite the bulkiness of the giant gloves and their ability to tear down buildings, her embrace is surprisingly gentle. Leaning close enough for my breasts to smother hers, I grab one of her chiseled biceps and look up slightly to meet her gaze. “I know you’re the one who owes me but… I’ll be sure to do the same for you.”

When the elevator chimes our destination, we hesitantly separate and walk down a short hallway to her room. Taking out her access card and swiping it down a scanner, she pushes open the door to reveal a penthouse suite like no other. Walking further in, I feel like I was transported into what I imagined a ghetto in Zaun to be like. Minus the toxic waste… to an extent. Piles of paperwork were strewn everywhere as if a maddened scientist was living here. Beer cans and pizza boxes formed twin mountaintops in the living room. A disturbing amount of laundry lay haphazardly everywhere. Squallor was a compliment.

Suddenly, an accent laden voice calls from the back.

“Oi! That you Vi? I thought you said you’d be home early to help me with all this paperwork you caused!”

I turn to the pink-haired cop to see an expression that could be best described as a mixture of panic and dread. Taking off her gauntlets and placing them on a specialized rack humming with power, she puts a finger to her mouth in a shushing gesture. “Sorry Cupcake! I was just out... reflecting on the damage I did earlier! I’m here now though so… Let’s get that shit over with!”

“Ah good. That explains the extra footsteps then. You brought a friend to help.”

Silently facepalming, Vi waves me to take off my boots as she does the same. With a shrug, I do as I’m told while placing my belt and pistols on a takeout container filled countertop. I follow her around several piles of refuse to a darkened hallway. We pass several rooms in varying states of cleanliness. One contains a massive collection of gym equipment. Another looks like a small workshop with various tools, rifles and gauntlet parts scattered everywhere.

Before reaching an office at the end of the hallway were two bedrooms opposite to each other. The messy one, which I assumed to be Vi’s room, had a worn punching bag hung in the corner next to a drum set, the walls plastered with posters of strangely dressed fighters with ‘NWA’ printed at the bottom. The other was relatively plain with shelves of books, fancy furniture and a strange assortment of hats. The only similarities the two rooms had were pictures of Vi and an attractive woman happily smiling together.

_Shit. What have I gotten myself into?_

Making it to the end of the hallway, I step inside the office. The woman from the photos sits behind a desk stacked with what I assumed were police reports of some kind along with a dozen empty cups of coffee and a half full bottle of expensive looking liquor. She brushes a stray dark blue lock from her face while straightening her purple blouse. Looking up with piercing blue eyes the woman examines me from head to toe with a cocked brow. 

She gets up from her desk to reveal her tight hourglass figure and approaches with an outraised hand. “Hello. The name’s Caitlyn.” 

Her stern demeanour and posh accent was overwhelming, the combination of the two complementing each other in a way that caused my knees to weaken. Immediately I knew Vi had excellent taste.

“Sheriff of the Wardens and Vi’s partner,” she finishes, her breath slightly reeking of alcohol.

My eye twitches. _Another cop. Seriously?_ I accept her handshake cooly. “Sarah Fortune. New friend of Vi.”

“Also Captain of the Crimson Scabbard, bounty hunter extraordinaire, hero of Bilgewater and vanquisher of the dreaded Gangplank. Did I miss anything?” she says with a smug smile.

_Oh crap._

“Also beer drinking champion of Delayed Progress!” adds Vi merrily with seemingly no reaction to my added titles.

“So that’s where you’ve been...” Hands clasped behind her back, Caitlyn begins to pace around us.

Vi straightens her posture with an audible gulp, practically admitting her guilt.

“You said _beer drinking champion._ That means she beat you at your own game. Given that you royally messed up today when chasing those hooligans, there was certainly no way you had the funds to pay for losing said drinking contest.” Caitlyn looks at her friend accusingly. “So Sarah here has come to collect...” 

With a laugh, I turn to face our interrogator. “Hey, you’re pretty good at this.”

“Comes with the territory Sarah.” Putting a hand to her forehead in exhaustion, Caitlyn lets out a sigh. “I’m afraid though, that I had splurged on some expensive _things_ the day before so the well is a tad dry at the moment.” She returns to her desk and pours herself a small glass.

I cross my arms and scoff. “Well first of all, Vi never even told me she had a roommate. Second, we settled on a different method of repayment me besides cash. Third, she and I agreed to bang until I have my money’s worth.”

Caitlyn chokes on her drink. “VI YOU FUCKING AGREED TO WHAT?!”

“In exchange for covering my drinks, Sarah wants to get down with me tonight.” The athletic woman shrugs ineffectually. “Jeez Cupcake. I thought you were supposed to be good at this investigation stuff.”

For the first time, the usually composed woman looks dumbfounded. “We’re supposed to be partners Vi! On and off duty.” She points an accusing finger at me. “How in bloody hell do you think I would be okay with this?”

Twiddling her fingers, Vi looks away in shame. “I’m a bit tipsy… and crossed the line.” Visibly struggling, she manages to return her partner’s gaze. “I’m sorry Caitlyn.”

Feeling a knot of guilt twist around my stomach, I glance at my new friend worriedly and then to her fuming partner. I take off my hat. “Alright listen. I didn’t know I was going to be a homewrecker by asking her to pay me back this way. I mean, it’s totally her fault for not mentioning that she was taken in the first place but it’s also on me for making the offer while she was drunk.” I look solemnly at Caitlyn, our blue eyes clashing with palpable intensity. “I really don’t want to fuck up what you two have got going.” 

From the corner of my eye, I see Vi give me a small smile.

Lowering my head in defeat, I start making my way for the exit. “I’ll be in town until tomorrow evening. We can figure something out by then.”

Before I step out of the office, the sudden slam of heavy glass and a satisfied groan causes me to stop.

“Hold it right there,” Caitlyn growls.

Turning around I see the officer wipe her mouth with a sleeve, her other hand firmly holding the now empty bottle of liquor on her desk. A clear blush betrays her serious features.

“First off, Vi’s instincts are always on point. There’s no way she would let herself get taken advantage of by someone with truly malicious intent. Second, I trust her. She would never intentionally try to hurt me or our relationship.”

A grin spreads across Vi’s face, her confidence returning with heated fervor.

“Third of all, I’m also a bit drunk. After taking a good look at you, I don’t blame her.” Eyes fluttering, she gives me another once over, her gaze lingering on my chest. “I’ll probably end up regretting this in the morning, but... we can arrange Vi’s _payment_ in my room. Together. Right now preferably.” Shakily getting up from her desk, she walks up to Vi and leans forward giving her a peck on the cheek. Disappearing into her room, she motions for us to follow.

“She took that waaaaay better than I expected,” I whisper. 

Touching the spot where she was kissed, Vi closes her eyes in contentment. “She might be a hardass a lot of the time but she loves me. Come on, let’s not keep Cupcake waiting.”

  
  


* * *

  
  


Initially coming to Piltover for strictly business, I never thought that I would find myself in the position I was in now. Having freshened up with a hot shower beforehand, I sit buck naked in the bed of a Warden’s room before two of the sexiest officers I ever had the pleasure of meeting. 

Stripped down to an elegant set of black laced lingerie that served to accentuate her pale curves, Caitlyn idly twirls a set of fuzzy pink handcuffs around her finger. Standing next to her is Vi who was wearing a matching grey seamless bra and panties, she holds an identical pair of cuffs against her wide hips. Both had on blue officer caps and black tinted aviator glasses.

“Looks like the perp isn’t willing to cooperate,” Caitlyn declares while tipping down her shades, stern eyes radiating lust.

Chewing noisily on a piece of gum, Vi blows a bubble only for it to pop messily against her lips. “Not to worry Cupcake, we’ve got other ways to get criminal scum like her to talk. Cuff her.” 

I bite my bottom lip excitedly as both of them walk to either side of me brandishing their restraints. Softly pushing me down flat on the bed, Vi begins securing my right hand to a bedpost while Caitlyn does the same to my left. Tugging against my fluffy bonds to no avail, I feel utterly at their mercy. Long crimson hair splayed out in a mess. Arms spread wide, leaving my large breasts exposed and heaving in anticipation. Supple thighs grinding seductively in an effort to hide my exposed womanhood. I must have been quite the sight to behold.

Caitlyn grabs a dark pair of disposable gloves from atop a nearby dresser. “Perp restrained. Let’s begin the inspection.” 

Already putting on her own pair, Vi stretches one around her wrist with a satisfying snap. “Make sure to check every nook and cranny on her.”

Nodding in agreement Caitlyn joins Vi as they flank me from both sides. “I’ll check the top first, you search the bottom quarters on my go,” orders Caitlyn as she gets on the bed. 

Straddling my midsection between her luscious thighs, the Sheriff immediately reaches for my breasts. With a delicate touch, she struggles to handle both mountains of flesh as she studies every corner of my cleavage. Her slender gloved fingers caress and squeeze every inch of my milky white mounds in a tender massage. Even with her shades on I could tell her eyes were blown wide open in amazement at the sheer size of them. The sensation of her fondling quickly rouses my nipples to their full height as if begging for more of the officer’s attention. Unable to escape my bonds, all I can do is push my chest further into her grasp.

Eager to please them further, she grabs the stiffened nubs between her forefingers and thumbs, the pinches sending penetrating shocks of pleasure to my very core. I open my mouth wide, letting out a raunchy moan in ecstasy at the rough treatment. Caitlyn seizes the opportunity and dives straight in with a sloppy kiss. The rich flavour of scotch flows over my taste buds in a trade of alcohol infused saliva as our tongues wrestle for dominance. Refusing to let go, she continues her sordid ministrations on my sensitive areolas as we continue sampling each other.

“Ahem. Anytime now Cupcake,” Vi reminds while popping another bubble.

Releasing a quivering nipple, Caitlyn snaps her fingers signalling for the go ahead and quickly returns to tending to my flesh. 

“Heheheh. Time for a little breach and clear!” Vi spits out her gum to a satisfying clink of a nearby trash can and climbs on.

Kneeling on the foot of the bed, Vi leans forward to grab both my knees and pries them open to reveal my bare womanhood in all its glistening glory. Without hesitation, she goes in face first, pressing her open mouth against my already slickened folds and starts slobbering over them like a feral dog. Combining our fluids with the pressure of her lips, Vi begins devouring my pussy in a sloppy feast. Instinctively, my legs tense in an effort to snap shut but are held firmly apart by the officer’s muscled arms.

Moaning shamelessly into Caitlyn, I feel my first orgasm hit me in a quaking wave of pure pleasure. My excitement splatters in a spectacular mess against Vi’s face as my tongue spasms wildly in Caitlyn’s mouth. Slowly recovering from the intensity of the climax, my legs give out and slump weakly down on the bed. 

Presented with an opening, Vi brings her hands into play and begins sliding her gloved fingers around my drenched nethers. Coating as much of the excess mixture of juice and saliva on them as possible, she easily inserts two fingers in my well-lubed pussy to the knuckle. I clench tightly around her digits, the tension against my muscles racking up more pleasure as she rhythmically pumps in and out. Her other hand creeps between the cleft of my cheeks and begins pressing my defenseless asshole. In a two pronged assault, Vi ravages my vagina with one hand while teasing my anus with the other.

Eyes bursting open, my whole body starts thrashing about violently. Still laying on top, Caitlyn fully straddles against my torso, the fabric of her bra grinding against my nipples as she cups my face in her hands and catches me in a deep kiss. The embrace manages to calm my body down and I allow both women to further violate my holes without little struggle. Steadily getting my folds pumped by three fingers now, my asshole getting stuffed by two, I release a silent moan into Caitlyn’s mouth as I ride through another climax, this one far more sensual than before. 

Feeling the lack of movement underneath her, Caitlyn gets off me in an effort to catch her breath and gestures Vi away. Extracting all her fingers from my body with a wet slurp, she sits back. All is silent in the room save for our heavy breathing. Crawling around me to the bedposts, Vi and Caitlyn unlock my handcuffs. My arms fall limply on the bed as my wrists are finally released. Rolling on my side, I slowly curl up into a tight ball, knees hugged tightly against my chest. Eyes closed as I shiver, two bodies sit close on either side of me, surrounding me in their warmth. I stay in that position for what feels like minutes as my body recovers. The soft touch of an ungloved hand brushes away the sweat soaked hair covering my face as I feel a gentle kiss me on the head. Finally opening up, I see Vi's warm smile greet me, her lilac-coloured eyes no longer hidden by shades or shade from a cap’s visor.

Without turning away, she begins speaking. “What do you say, Cupcake? Was the inspection a success?”

“Aye. Subject was highly cooperative with law enforcement during the search. She is innocent.” With a playful slap, Caitlyn pats my butt in recognition. 

To my disappointment, Vi gets up and leaves the room. Sliding her arms around my body, Caitlyn pushes herself against my back and begins spooning me. Her hands cup my boobs protectively and begin massaging around my sore nipples. I sigh in relief.

Reluctantly, Caitlyn stops and pulls her hand back. “Did I ever tell you what it was that I spent my money on that caused this to happen?” the Sheriff whispers directly into my ear.

“No actually.”

Unwrapping herself from me, she gets off the bed and disappears into a closet. Walking into the room carrying three mugs, Vi puts down one on the dresser and passes another to me. I look inside to find crystal cool water. We both sit cross legged on the bed and sip from our mugs, simply enjoying each other’s company.

“You know Sarah… Maybe I should lose more drinking contests. This is a lot of fun.” She shows her teeth in a genuine smile.

“I’m having a fantastic time. This my best run-in with the law I’ve ever had!”

Caitlyn emerges from the closet, no longer wearing her aviators, cap or lingerie. She carries a pearly white dildo humming with power in each hand. 

“Alright ladies, break time is over. Time to test if these things were worth the fortune.” She turns to me. “Pun intended.”

“Oh my god. Cupcake! Don’t tell me you actually sprung for the Deluxe Overdrive Edition!”

“You know I did. Only the best for my favourite woman in the world,” she admits before tossing one of the dildos over to her partner.

Quirking a brow in scrutiny, I watch Vi marvel at it as if the toy were a work of art. “What’s so special about them? They look kinda small...”

Presenting it like a divine relic for a hero to wield, she begins tracing the different features of the device. “This is a newly released, top of the line model crafted by the best eggheads in Piltover. The main body’s got an inner layer of malleable smart gel which expands and contracts based on the wearer’s pleasure. In other words, it starts out small but grows as you fuck!” She rotates it around pointing out several bumps along its length. “Inside key points are the strongest compact motors out there, only made possible through the implementation of hextech. These things are engineered to rip an orgasm right out of ya!”

Whistling my amazement, I look it over with renewed appreciation. “Wearer’s? Oh! It’s a strapless strap-on! Now that is something.”

“Heh. That’s not all though.” She flips it around to reveal the rear portion. Not nearly as large as its primary shaft, I see the part known as the ‘saddle horn’ curve upward with several ridges so the user can hold it inside. “Even the one wearing it will get some love! Depending on how much pressure is applied to the main shaft, sensors will signal the horn to alter the intensity of its vibrations.” Hefting it dramatically overhead, Vi whoops in excitement. “It basically simulates a dick!”

With a hungering groan, Caitlyn steps forward, already firmly plugged and strapped into her’s. “You didn’t even mention the texture and temperature change features!” She holds two small remotes but places them on the dresser. “We can check those out later. Now, enough nerding about the gadget, let’s put them to use!”

Eager to try it out, Vi pulls off her bra and panties and brings it close to her dripping snatch only for Caitlyn’s hand to get in the way.

“Ah ah ah. Since you’ve done such a good job at explaining it to her, why not let Sarah have a go first?” 

With a playful wink, Vi passes the extravagant strap-on to me and sits down on the middle of the bed with her legs straight out in a relaxed position. “I hope you’ve still got the strength to hold it in Red.”

Hefting the fleshy device in my hand, I start putting it on. “Your fingering was just a warm up, I could do this all night!” I spit on the saddle horn and lather it well before placing it against my still-soaked lips. “Time to see if this thing is as good as you say.” My folds happily spread to accommodate the bulbous end before I dock it deep enough for it to fit snugly against my most sensitive areas. A surge of excitement pours into my core as my muscles adjust and clench around the strap-on. The device emits a jubilant chime once I feel that it is secured.

Just to the right of Vi, Caitlyn kneels up straight with her own strap-on hovering just below the pink-haired officer’s chin. “Alright love, as you often like to say, ‘ _it’s time to put up or shut up._ ’”

I slide to the opposite side, mirroring Caitlyn’s position so Vi could only see the pearly white dildos wagging enticingly in front of her like a pair of mouthwatering sausages.

“Fine by me. I’ll let my hands do the talking!” Without hesitation, she grabs both in either hand and starts pumping them simultaneously along their shafts.

Immediately I feel the strap-on react to her touch, a soft pulsing massages my insides as the device matches her movement. I can barely hold back a moan as the vibrations get stronger as she pumps faster and faster. Hearing her heavy breathing, I look to see Vi take the head of Caitlyn’s dildo between her lips while continuing to stroke. A thin layer of saliva coats the shaft as she bobs forward and back along its length, each time taking in more of the artificial meat. To my surprise, I notice it beginning to expand. Once slim enough to easily cup her hand around, it grew to at least twice it’s normal girth, probably two inches in diameter. Relentless in her effort to gorge on her partner’s length whole, Vi increases her pace as Caitlyn tugs her hair in an effort to steady herself.

“Fuck! Vi!” Caitlyn cries out with an obscene wail.

With no more room to pump, her hand holds her partner’s thigh for support as Vi pushes her face forward with all her might. Nose mashing against the top of Caitlyn’s groin, she holds the entire shaft in her throat for an extended period of time. A small amount of fluid dribbles from below the base of Caitlyn’s strap-on as her grip on Vi’s hair loosens. Pulling out with an agonizingly drawn out slurp, Vi finally let’s go of the shaft with a satisfying, almost comical, pop. Grinning as various fluids dribble down her mouth, she allows Caitlyn to sit back as her strap-on begins to shrink. 

Turning her full attention to me, Vi tackles me down like a slavering dog, eager to get at my strap-on. In much faster fashion to what she did with Caitlyn, she gets straight to devouring me. Greedily taking in as much of my girth as will fit into her mouth as possible, I feel more of the device whir to action inside me in reaction to the increased stimulus as she continues pumping. As the shaft grows, so too do the saddlehorn’s ministrations. In addition to vibrating in rhythm with Vi’s chugging, it slowly begins to expand, seeking to touch every surface of my sensitive flesh. Closing my eyes, I focus on the pulses of pleasure and Vi’s slurping as the machine takes me to the edge. Before my release comes, I feel an abrupt jostling as Vi’s fellatio falters against my false member. Opening my eyes, I notice Caitlyn lift her partner’s hips up and line her strap-on with it. 

Sputtering out my dildo, Vi turns her head around in panic. “Cupcake! What the hell are you doing?”

“You’ve been working so hard to please the two of us, I thought that I should give you some attention too.” Swatting Vi’s bountiful ass with a loud crack, Caitlyn shoves her member inside.

“Ahhhhh! Really? All in one fucking go?!” Vi complains with an exaggerated groan.

“You lubed it up quite nicely. I don’t see why not.” Caitlyn throws another slap as she pulls out and thrusts back in, slightly slower this time.

“Awww yeah… Just like- GLUUURK!” 

“Eat this!” Before Vi can finish her sentence, I grab her head and force myself inside her open mouth.

Now kneeling on all fours like a back alley bitch, Vi takes in our shafts from both ends at the same time as if she was being spitroasted. In unison, Caitlyn and I repeatedly penetrate the toned officer between our bodies, like we were trying to touch tips. The saddle horn of my strap-on seems to oscillate even harder as Vi wetly gorges on my shaft even faster than before. Our actions become so intense that I grasp her partially shaved head to support myself. Moaning with depraved lust, we plough the larger woman ragged, giving her no time to rest between each thrust. 

The sensation of an orgasm peaking once again, I suddenly feel Caitlyn change her thrust speed so we shove inside her partner one at a time, causing me to lose my rhythm. Now going in one at a time, we force Vi’s entire body forward and back allowing us to make longer pushes like a perverted seesaw. The sounds of slapping, slobbering and moaning fill the room as I change the pace once again and force my strap-on inside Vi at the same time as Caitlyn with a haggard scream. Something inside me finally breaks from the now earthquake-like pulses of the vibrator as my climax burns stars in my vision. Catching myself from falling, I raise my arms overhead in triumph as I look at the woman opposite to me with drawn out breath. Hesitating for a moment, she does the same and our hands clasp in midair as we form a monument of carnal desire with all three of our bodies. 

Feeling my lower half give out, I let go of Caitlyn and slip out of Vi’s mouth, collapsing on my side as the device buzzing inside me slows to a stop from the sudden lack of stimulus. Taking one last slap against her partner’s raised rear, Caitlyn reluctantly pulls away and sits back with a satisfied huff. No longer stuffed in either end, Vi allows her body to crumple down on the bed unceremoniously.

I take in shallow breaths as I extract the strap-on with a satisfying squelch. “You were right, Vi. These things are… as good as you said they were and then some.” I hold the excitement drenched toy in my hand with a new sense of appreciation. _I kinda want one..._

Rising up like a body possessed, the pink-haired woman snatches the device right from my hand and implants it inside her freshly fucked vagina with murderous intent burning in her eyes. Before Caitlyn can react, Vi flips her over on her hands and knees with surprising ease. Grabbing the smaller officer’s elbow in a rear arm lock, Vi simultaneously pushes her upper torso down against the bed with one hand while lifting Caitlyn’s ass upward with the other. I gawk in amazement at Vi’s ability to restrain her partner in mere seconds, strap-on aimed at the woman’s exposed rear.

“This is for slapping my ass Cupcake!” Without remorse, Vi plunges her flaccid length into Caitlyn, the strap-on thankfully drenched from her own previous fellatio from when I was wearing it. 

Eliciting a surprised howl, Caitlyn struggles feebly as her anus is pistoned into with a steadily increasing tempo. “I’m. Ugh. Sorry. Ugh. Loosen. Ugh. Up a. UGH. BIT!” she manages to plead with her face half buried In the sheets.

Letting go of her torso Vi viciously swats her partner’s ass in triumph. “What was that Cupcake? I can’t hear you over the sound of me fucking this cute ass of yours!” Cackling with hyena-like laughter, she alternates between spanking the helpless officer’s reddening cheeks.

Mesmerized by the debauchery playing out before me, I notice Caitlyn’s flaccid strap-on flail uselessly beneath her. Zeroing in on Vi’s plump backside jiggle with each thrust, I give it a playful pinch to get her attention. 

Slowing down her thrusts, she leans her head back, eyes staring dangerously at me. “What?! Can’t you see I’m busy getting a little payback here?”

I whisper lecherously into her ear. “Can you hold her up so she faces me while still fucking her ass?”

Pausing a moment to contemplate my request, she gives Caitlyn another resounding slap and turns back to me. “Hell yeah I can!” Finally letting go of the rear arm lock, she allows the smaller woman a moment of respite, pulling out her throbbing strap-on with a grunt. 

Struggling to maintain a steady breath, Caitlyn kneels low as if bowing in complete supplication. Stretching her arm out to lessen the fatigue, she reaches out to touch her tender cheeks. “Fucking hell Vi...” the woman mutters while feeling her asshole trying to contract.

After rolling her shoulders with a satisfying pop, Vi stands on the bed and spreads her hands out wide, her toned form casting a menacing shadow over Caitlyn. Squatting down and wrapping her arms around the smaller woman from behind, she grasps both of Caitlyn’s thighs at the crook of the knees, keeping her legs tucked against her body. I watch in awe as, in a display of ludicrous strength, Vi deadlifts her partner into the air like she was nothing. Still not done, she snakes her arms further up, folding Caitlyn like an accordian and clasping her hands behind her head to finish applying some sort of depraved full nelson submission hold. 

_Damn she’s flexible._

Roaring in triumph, Vi parades Caitlyn’s exposed nethers before sitting back against the headboard. “You alright there Cupcake?”

Turning her head as far as she can, Caitlyn looks up to the bulkier woman. “Yeah… Just go a bit slower this time, alright?”

Vi nods while nuzzling the side of her partner’s face in silent affirmation. 

Relaxing further into the irregular embrace, Caitlyn fumbles for Vi’s shaft, clumsily lining it up with her anus. “Give me your best shot,” she challenges while easing the pearly white head inside.

Smiling deviously, Vi restarts her thrusting, albeit at a more comfortable speed. Seeing Caitlyn close her eyes with contentment as she gets ploughed in her exposed position, I decide to go ahead with my plan and give her unattended strap-on some attention. Standing over the two lovers, I crouch low and mount Caitlyn’s member, causing her eyes to pop wide open. I press forward, locking her in a deep kiss in an effort to have another taste of her liquor infused mouth. Holding Vi’s shoulders for support we sandwich her tightly between our bodies. She halfheartedly attempts to return the gesture, unable to focus while being assaulted simultaneously from behind by Vi and in front by her own toy’s vibrations. 

I feel the strap-on pulse inside me, growing slightly every time I slide up and down its length. It expands, not as precisely as the saddle horn but definitely far more thorough. With each bounce, my ample breasts slap against her smaller ones, our nipples constantly colliding with a light shock and adding more kindling to our respective fires. Vision clouding, Caitlyn releases the kiss, unable to keep up as her tongue lolls out to the side as she tenses in a panting orgasm. Alternating to constantly heap more and more pleasure into her, Vi pushes in while I pull myself out. I slide forward while she pulls back. 

I feel the strap-on’s growth cease, its veiny texture well defined now as they rub pleasurably against my inner walls. Refusing to merely spread my lips wide, the toy suddenly begins to vibrate, its motors steadily massaging me as we continue. The entire shaft stirs, injecting me with a new form of ecstasy as it buzzes with enough intensity to reach my clitoris. 

Faltering against the new sensation, my face falls against Caitlyn’s shoulder as I fully sheathe myself on her marvelous, artificial girth. My sight blurs in a kaleidoscopic explosion of colour as I instinctively hug Caitlyn and Vi to keep my soul from leaving. Without thinking, my body moans in euphoria causing a chain reaction as the two below answer back in kind, our screams filling the penthouse suite with our love.

We remain in that position for only a moment before we begin to unravel. Vi sits back, her strap-on finally leaving Caitlyn’s exhausted asshole. She slowly lets go of the full nelson hold, tenderly setting her partner’s legs down on the bed and letting her sit on her lap. I manage to push myself off of Caitlyn’s member and throw my head back while gasping for breath. Vision returning, I see Caitlyn slumped comfortably on Vi as they quietly recover. The larger woman embraces her from behind, arms loosely wrapped around her torso. Caitlyn rests her head against Vi’s shoulder, a hand stroking the short-cut section of her head. Shaking off my fatigue I overhear the two whispering.

“I love you Caitlyn.”

“I love you Vi.”

Forcing my body to move, I get off the bed and leave the room.

  
  


* * *

  
  


_Holy shit._

I walk around the darkened hall and find the bathroom beside an empty pile of flattened cardboard. A lightbulb flicks on automatically when I step inside and I turn on the faucet. After splashing cool water on my face I look at myself in the mirror. My lightly freckled face smiles back as I brush away a few crimson strands sticking to it. Composing myself, I wipe myself off using a nearby towel and leave.

_I love Piltover._

Paying no heed to the chaotic state of the apartment, I make my way back to Caitlyn’s room to find the two women drinking from their mugs. Caitlyn sits at the edge of the bed with an arm crossed under her chest. Vi stands on the carpet with one hand resting against her hip. Both wear their freshly cleaned strap-ons.

“I think it’s time to finish up for tonight, Red. What do ya say?” Vi sneers before setting her mug down on the dresser.

“I’d say that you’ve already paid off your debt and then some,” I answer back smugly. “But if you girls can’t get enough of me…” I pose with my hip slightly pushed to one side while sliding my hands over my waist and breasts sensually. “Who am I to deny such _fine_ officers of the law.”

Letting out a low growl, Vi grabs me by my hair and bends me facedown against the side of the bed. With plenty of juices still lubricating my insides, she pushes into my needy folds easily. I let out a groan of delight as the false member repeatedly pounds me. Caitlyn, who had climbed to the center of the bed, kneels before me with her shaft hovering next to my mouth, motioning to take it in. With no further goading needed, I begin licking every square centimeter of the bulbous toy like it was a delectable slab of meat. 

Purring from my enthusiastic feasting, she holds up a small device to my face. “These strap-ons have a whole lot more to them than what you’ve already experienced.” With an exaggerated flair, she pushes a button on it.

Immediately, I feel a cooling sensation deep within me as Vi’s dildo somehow gets colder, just to the point of discomfort. Propping myself up on my elbows, I look past my swaying breasts to see the device emit a pale blue glow as my loins experience a tingling, shivering sensation. Giving a hefty spank, Vi forces me back down on my stomach while continuing to piston back and forth. The shaft keeps cooling until my breathing starts to seize, the cold penetration stealing the air from my lungs. 

Resting a cheek on her palm Caitlyn smiles when she notices my discomfort and presses another button. “Don’t worry love, I won’t keep you out in the cold for too long.”

The creeping chill immediately abates, a sudden warmth now flowing through my nethers as the device switches to a heat setting. Feeling my cooled folds begin to thaw, I exhale as a light orgasm wracks my body from the sheer relief.

“Whoa. She sure liked that one, Cupcake!” Vi whoops as she shakily pulls out.

“There’s more where that came from Sarah. Here, get her on the bed.”

With seemingly no effort, Vi does as she is told and flips me on my back before sitting me on her shoulders backwards so my slippery crotch rests against her face. “Hold on tight Red!” 

“Whoa! Whoa!” I clasp my hands around the back of her scalp for balance as she steps up on the bed, my head just shy of hitting the ceiling. 

Keeping hold of my lower back, Vi sits down and gently slams me on the bed between her legs. “POWERBOMB!” she calls out with glee.

Left only slightly dazed, I can’t help but laugh at her ridiculous antics. “Where did you learn that one Vi?”

Helping me to my knees, she gives a wide smile. “The NWA, Noxian Wrestling Association, did a show in Piltover once and I’ve been hooked on the stuff ever since!”

“Vi, you do know that stuff is fake right?” Caitlyn scolds.

“ _Scripted_ Cupcake. There’s a difference. And besides, that doesn’t change the fact that the stuff they do in the ring is AWESOME!” 

_What the hell are they talking about?_

Caitlyn holds her hands up in surrender before going over to the nearby dresser and getting yet another controller. “Regardless, let’s do a little _tag team_ on Sarah here, shall we?” She passes the new device over to her partner.

Vi snags the controller in midair. “Damn straight!” 

Still kneeling on my haunches, she pulls me close so that my legs straddle around her lap, the strap-on wagging just between our midriffs. Faces almost uncomfortably close, I stare into her gorgeous lilac eyes and feel a slight blush come over me. Vi breaks our mutual gaze first as she looks over my shoulder. I feel Caitlyn kneel behind and push me forward causing my breasts to cradle nicely against Vi’s. Gasping in shock, I realize far too late what they were going to do to me. 

The larger woman positions her strap-on in line with my vagina and eases inside before I feel Caitlyn do the same with my asshole. With a perfectly staggered rhythm, the officers repeatedly thrust into me with overwhelming effect. Not a moment passes that one of my orifices isn’t filled. In and out. In and out. First my vagina and then my asshole. Their shafts grow larger with each shove, the saddle horns buzzing inside their owners spurring them on. My insides contort with agonizing pleasure as the full size of both, for a tiny moment in their cycle of constant penetration, share my body. When one pulls free and the other pushes in, that small instant where the shared flesh of my rectum and vagina squeeze together blurs my mind with an explosion of sublime ecstasy. Feeling yet another orgasm boiling inside, they both shove inside at the same time, their shafts’ vibrations pulsing together in an effort to overload my senses.

Stringing together words in an incoherent mess of begging and screaming , I convince the two to keep their devices in me to maintain my high. Caitlyn wraps an arm around my neck, showing the remote once again and revealing its many buttons. Vi does the same in front. Sight blurring with multi-hued light, I am unable to keep track of how many they press. A medley of new sensations course through me as the strap-ons switching settings. 

First, Caitlyn’s starts cooling while Vi’s heats up. I feel as if a constant supply of cooled balls flows through my ass without truly filling it. Small bumps extend out from the vaginal shaft as the entire thing slowly rotates clockwise and then counterclockwise, hotly scraping against my inner walls. Both go through dozens of combinations of temperature and textural changes as my mind begins to black out.

Before I lose consciousness, I feel Vi’s face press against mine, the gesture somehow keeping me awake. Tiredly opening my eyes, the strap-ons recede before both women wrap themselves around me, keeping me upright. My pussy and anus feeling completely satisfied while struggling to contract. Caitlyn’s hot breath on my neck, her arms lazily wrapped around my torso. Vi’s lips locked with my own, her warm lap supporting my haunched position. Their breasts press against my back and underneath my own. These are the last things I experience before falling asleep.

  
  


* * *

  
  


Eyes fluttering open, I find myself alone and lying in Caitlyn’s plush bed, snugly tucked in underneath its warm covers. An assortment of strangely shaped hats hanging on the wall are the first things to greet me. Sunshine leaks out through the window blinds next to the headwear. I groggily sit up, a dull throbbing in my head surely caused by last night’s drinks. The unfamiliar friction of clothes which were not my own rubs against my body. Pushing off the blanket reveals a light blue dress shirt (a couple left unbuttoned at the top to accomodate ample bust) and baggy sport briefs. An alluring scent of freshly cooked bacon wafts into my nose, driving me further awake. With a tired yawn, I get out of bed and walk out in the brightly lit hallway, following the scent. Rubbing my eyes, I happen upon the kitchen where Caitlyn and Vi are making breakfast.

Dressed in a similar shirt to mine, Caitlyn also dons a refined set of dark panties. “Morning Sarah. Say, you’re not too sore, are you? We rubbed some muscle cream on you before tucking you in,” she explains in a chipper tone. Grabbing a couple waffles from a baroque toasting device, she adds them to an already well-stacked plate. 

Stretching my legs, I find little discomfort in the movement. “Good morning. Now that you mention it, I can walk surprisingly straight considering what we did. Thanks.” 

Wearing a sporty tank top with a nearly identical pair of briefs to the ones I had on, Vi walks out from behind the counter with a plate in hand. I notice that my guns are missing from where I had placed them last night.

_Huh._

Plating a pan of mouth watering bacon, she turns to me with a sly smirk. “Heh. That’s about the only thing _straight_ about you, Red.” 

Unable to resist giggling at the lighthearted comment, I clear my throat. “Sorry for falling asleep on you guys. I really didn’t intend on staying that long. Also, thanks for the clothes.”

“Surely you don’t think we would let a friend wander the streets in the middle of the night! Now come on, time for breaky.” Walking over to a small, circular table, Caitlyn lays down her grand plate of waffles along with another plate of golden hash browns. 

Vi sits next to her partner with a large plate of bacon, sunnyside eggs and a small teapot. “You fine with sorta runny eggs?”

Shifting awkwardly, I join the two on the last chair. “Love ‘em. Thanks for breakfast. And the change of clothes.”

“You look quite fetching in our clothes,” Caitlyn compliments while sipping from a small cup of tea. “Mmm! Vi, you’ve outdone yourself with this batch!” 

Vi carefully pours a cup and passes it over to me. “Really? I guess spiking it with those hangover pills did the trick.” 

We each gather our own portions of the spread onto separate plates and begin eating. The hash browns were crispy on the outside and fluffy on the inside. The sunny side eggs had been cooked well with a gooey yolk. The waffles were light and buttery. The bacon was succulent and salty. The tea had a bitter and refined malty flavour. Everything was so delicious that I could feel my headache fade away as I devoured half my plate in mere minutes.

“So Sarah,” Caitlyn turns to me while dripping syrup over a mound of waffles. “What brought you to Piltover in the first place? We’re a bit of a ways from Bilgewater. Surely it wasn’t just for some Amber Sump?” she asks while slicing apart the toasted food. 

_Aw crap._

The headache returns as I scold myself for getting involved with two Wardens. Realizing that it was useless to lie to the perceptive woman, I swallow the last bit of bacon in my mouth with an audible gulp. “Well...” My eyes shift uncomfortably between Caitlyn’s analytical gaze and Vi’s comedically overstuffed mouth. “After taking care of business back home, establishing a government and wiping any trace of that bastard Gangplank from existence, I decided to kick back and go on a trip. Sail across Runeterra with my trusty crew, finding lovely women like yourselves and… do what we did last night.”

Their reactions could not be more dissimilar. Caitlyn nearly chokes on her waffles, managing to wash it down by chugging a full cup of tea. Vi laughs hysterically while pounding on the table.

“Hahaha! Oh man! Meanwhile, Cupcake and I figured that you were here just to buy some guns off one of the clans or chem barons!”

I exhale while pecking apart a hashbrown with my fork. “That too…”

Vi’s laughter dies down uncomfortably, her usual laidback composure tensing up just like when we first met in Delayed Progress the night before.

Leaning forward with her fingers clasped together, Caitlyn glares at me with cold, scrutinizing eyes. “Sarah. For what purpose would a _pirate_ have to purchase armaments from Piltover?”

Putting my fork down calmly, I look the Sheriff straight in the eyes. “Tell me something _Sheriff,_ what would you do to protect Piltover?” I look over to Vi who remains still. “How far would you go to keep the ones you love from dying? What lines would you cross?” 

Vi gets up from her seat and stands at the adjacent table edge between us, hands behind her back. Neither officer responds, prompting me to continue. 

“ _Pirate_. How I hate that term. Y’know, I started off as a bounty hunter looking to get rid of all the scum in Bilgewater. I wanted my people to know what it was like not to always fear those murderers. As you know, I succeeded in that regard. Though, some would argue that in the time it took for me to do that, I ended up becoming one myself.” I sip the rest of my tea before continuing. ”‘Pirate’ or ‘Warden,’ it doesn’t really matter when it boils down to it. Sure we’re on opposite ends of the law, but we both want the same thing: to keep our people safe.”

Crossing her arms imposingly, Vi says nothing while still presiding over us.

I stare intensely at the two speechless women. “You guys are sitting pretty here in Piltover, you know that? With your gold-paved streets and fancy hextech. Ever hear of the Harrowing? The Black Mist? Of course not because the good folks in Bilgewater are the only ones keeping that undead freakshow from fucking up the mainland.”

“Actually I have,” Caitlyn answers sternly. “Just stories though. Listen though, I can smell the rubbish people spew from their mouths halfway across the city. There’s not a hint of that on your breath.” She motions to take my cup which I pass over and begins refilling it. “I just wanted to make sure you weren’t planning on doing anything that would hurt Piltover.” Returning my drink, she pours more into her own. “Who are you buying from?”

Eyeing the cup, I stave off my suspicions and drink it anyways. “The Medarda Clan. Pretty sure I’ve locked in a deal with them already.”

“What makes you think it’s been finalized?”

“I threatened to make an offer with Zaun instead. I doubt they’d want any business slipping underground.”

The Sheriff sighs in exasperation. “You’re a wily one Sarah. Do you mind if a couple of Wardens oversee this exchange?” Caitlyn motions to herself and Vi.

“That’s fine by me. I’ll be heading over to my ship after we’re all done here.”

“Ah good. Let’s finish up breakfast then.” Brushing away her dark hair in relaxation, she returns to sipping away at her tea.

Vi snorts and goes back to her seat. “Told you Cupcake, nothing to worry about. When have I ever let you down?” she teases while scarfing a whole hashbrown.

A subtle grin spreads on Caitlyn’s face. “Besides keeping our fair city’s buildings intact, never.”

  
  


* * *

  
  


Overlooking the Piltover docks from the deck of the Syren is Nami, head resting on her crossed arms as she leans over the railing. She feels a calloused hand pat her on the back and she turns to see Rafen, the first mate of the Crimson Scabbard next to her. 

“Don’t worry lass. Sarah’ll come back. She always does,” he assures, conviction apparent in his gruff voice.

“I know. The wait’s just boring is all,” she responds glumly. “Hopefully she arrives before those Piltover guys leave.” The Marai motions to the suavely dressed men standing around several crates next to the Syren.

A voice from the crow’s nest calls out to the two. “Captain’s coming!”

Raising her head with enthusiasm, Nami squints to see the familiar buxom form of Sarah Fortune walk past the giant marble entrance of Piltover, followed closely by two strangely dressed, yet very much attractive women. One had on a huge pair of mechanical gloves while the other seemed to carry a long rifle on her back. Excitement getting the best of her, Nami quickly floats on a cushion of water down the ramp connecting to the dock and races towards her captain.

“Right-o, I’ll get one specially ordered. It should be ready in a couple months,” Caitlyn clarifies.

Sarah rubs her hands together with a devious smile. “Goooood, I look forward to owning one of those things for myself. You can expect me back around that time.”

“We’ll be waiting,” Vi adds with a smirk.

Arms outstretched, Nami embraces the redhead happily. “Sarah! I thought you said it wouldn’t take you past evening!” Her tail splashes behind her with joy.

The redhead returns the hug tightly, causing the younger girl to squeak. “Sorry Nami. After the meeting, I had a lot of trouble finding a drink.”

Breaking away, the Marai eyes Sarah with worry. “Judging from all the bruises on your neck, that’s not all… Did you have to shoot your way out?” She looks at the pair of holstered pistols on her captain's hips with suspicion.

Scratching the back of her head, Sarah motions to the two ladies flanking her. “Well, one thing led to another and I ended up meeting these fine officers of the law. And in a manner of speaking, yes. I did have to _shoot my way out._ ” 

Realizing what she meant, Nami covers her mouth in surprise. “Oh!”

“Sheriff Caitlyn and this is Enforcer Vi. We’re officers of the Wardens overseeing an _exchange_. A pleasure.” She tips her gigantic tophat and reaches out a fingerless glove clad hand.

Recomposing herself, the Marai turns to regard the woman. “Nami, Crimson Scabbard’s navigator. Nice to meet you!” she happily greets while shaking Caitlyn’s hand. Moving to Vi, she shyly grasps the offered oversized index of the Enforcer’s gauntlet and does the same.

“Never met a vastayan before,” Vi says with a wide smile. “So those scales on your torso, are those clothes or…?”

The four women chat as they make their way to the Syren. 

Approaching the lead of the well-dressed group of men, Sarah raises a brow. “Looks like it’s a deal then Cornelius.”

“Clan Medarda has indeed decided to accept your offer. One hundred units just as you ordered.” Cornelius motions to his men to slide open one of the four crates to reveal a wealth of crafted rifles. The middle aged man adjusts his monocle as he regards the two officers flanking Sarah. “To what do we owe the pleasure of _Piltover’s Finest_? I assure you that we have the proper papers prepared to distribute these weapons.”

“Just making sure everything is official, wouldn’t want anything to go awry in our fair city after all,” Caitlyn explains.

Several men from the Syren carry down a pair of treasure-laden chests, presenting them to Cornelius before getting to work hefting the guns onboard. Bowing before Sarah, the Medarda Clansmen take the chests and make their way back to the city gate.

“Well, that was probably the smoothest arms deal I’ve ever participated in,” quips Vi unenthusiastically while flexing her gauntlets. “I was kinda hoping something would go wrong.” 

“Things seldom go without a hitch with you around. I’m glad nothing happened to dissuade our fine guest from coming back.” Caitlyn motions to Sarah.

Lifting her tricorn hat to show more of her face, the captain gives a beaming smile. “Despite the pompous culture and the overbearing wealth, some of you guys are alright. I’d be happy to come back.”

“Rematch at Delayed Progress next time Red?” Vi points with a single raised brow.

“Heh. Of course Vi. Keep those fingernails short for me.”

Both women share a laugh as Caitlyn reaches for something attached to her back.

“Also Sarah, I want you to have this as a token of our appreciation.” Held out in her hand is a familiar pair of fuzzy cuffs. “I’m sure they’ll come in handy on your journey.”

“Oh, they will.” Taking the restraints, Sarah looks over at an already flustered Nami. “Guess this is it. I’ll see you guys next time I visit.”

Moving in close while shoving Caitlyn forward, Vi gathers the women in a group hug.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time publishing, any feedback is welcome so I can make future chapters better! Thanks for reading!


End file.
